Then don't snip it out or ignore it when provided
I have to hand it to you, Dink, you've taken the "Will Dockery Obsession"
the highest levels possible, I had forgotten you were even writing a full
scale biography of me a few years back. You really have Generic Troll,
even Peter beat on that level of obsessive stalking...
2. Who is Will Dockery?
A: Will Dockery is also known as "Ironywaves"...
Dockery is an employee of a pizza establishment known as Pizza Roma in
Columbus, Georgia in a small section of town called "Shadowville." Will's
behavior proves him to be anything but the typical employee of a pizza
parlor, however. He enjoys writing poetry while both on and off the job,
reading it in front of audiences in downtown coffee shops or local bars,
then basking in the audience's reaction.
Will is also an admitted drug and alcohol abuser, so it can be assumed
most of his writings originate while under the influence of one or both.
far Will has admitted to abusing marijuana and alcohol but remains rather
quiet on any stronger drugs that he may or may not have ingested. When
confronted with the fact that he is a possible alcoholic and drug abuser,
Will scoffed at the fact and stated that police officers frequently use
marijuana than ordinary citizens such as himself.
2a. What is a "pizza boy?"
A: A "pizza boy," or "pizza boy," or "pizzaboi," as it is sometimes
is much different than a pizza delivery driver. A pizza delivery person
works a job delivering pizzas. These are hard-working, respectful
individuals who are in college or just trying to eek out a living as much
they can. They are people who have lost their jobs suddenly, or people who
need income to help feed their children and family of five, or just
people looking for something different. Many of them are retirees working
job for supplemental pay in between social security checks. Others are in
for the love of the job, though they are few and far between.
A pizzaboy wants this as their only job until retirement and could care
about what the customer receives, so long as he or she receives a tip upon
delivery, regardless of how they act on your doorstep. Because of their
antisocial nature, some have been known to place bodily secretions onto
pizzas of customers they do not like, claim minorities are cheap,
homosexuals are evil (and call their enemies "fags" or "gay", thinking it
be a great flame), and are probably are misoginst as well. A pizzaboy is
usually stereotyped by the mainstream media and general as lazy, unshaven,
unbathed, hairy, rude, greedy, stupid, ignorant, antisocial, and
occassionally bigoted or sociopathic. A good example of a stereotype used
the media of a "pizzaboy" can be seen in the movie "Home Alone," where the
pizzaboy drives onto the lawn, knocks over and destroys a statue, walks up
to the door, bangs on it callously, then when he receives a low amount for
tip smirks and gets the door slammed in his face. Many pizza boys consider
people who do not tip "stiffers" and a few of the more antisocial and
stupider ones plot "revenge" or attempt to send a "message" to such
customers by delivering the pizza late or in poor condition. Should you
receive a pizza not in the condition you desired or it arrives late, it
be a good idea to contact the establishment from which you ordered. A sad
fact of life is that there are "pizza boys" in every establishment ever
Will Dockery is classified as a "pizza boy" because of his antisocial (and
slightly bigoted) attitude, his attitude towards customers, his
behavior towards women, his delusional and egotistical nature, and for the
fact that he just sucks. You really have to see him for yourself; luckily,
anyone who comes across Will on Usenet doesn't take to long to realize
how close he comes to the common stereotype of a pizza boy.
RAP. rec.arts.poems, a newsgroup of, well, poems -- at least it used to
until the shit hit the fan and splattered into layers too thick to be
removed using general household cleaners. Will enjoys posting to RAP
he considers himself a poet and an artist of the poetry circuit.
AAPC. alt.arts.poetry.comments, another poetry newsgroup where Will hangs
out to play. Frequently there are crossposts between
alt.arts.poetry.comments and rec.arts.poems as both newsgroups have
purposes and content.
You may encounter some names along your journey into [Will Dockery
that you are not familiar with. Here, in brief explanation, are some of
Amber. Amber is a former employee of Pizza Roma where Will works. Months
ago, Will's manager found her having sex with a fellow employee in the
room and blew a gasket. Will claims that Amber wasn't fired for fucking in
the back room but was fired for something else. According to Will, Amber
either had sex with or plans to have sex with every male employee of Pizza
Roma from the manager all the way to the owner. She is the truest example
a whore you could possibly find in Will's area.
Will Dockery. Self-explanatory. Will works for Pizza Roma and loves to
mystify Usenet with the various tales from the store, some of which would
cause any self-respecting health inspector to vomit. Will has hounddog
loyalty to his manager Pasko and would do anything to please him -- and we
do mean anything.
Pasko. Pasko is the retarded criminal who runs Pizza Roma. We say retarded
because that's about the only way to rationally explain away his poor
decisions and we say criminal because Will has admitted that Pasko is a
criminal. According to Will, Pasko buys bootleg copies of movies off the
street from strangers and has guns in his office that he gives to his
employees to take on runs to "dangerous areas." While both of these are
felonies, Will claims that Pasko is NOT a convicted felon and that the
he was in prison for was only a misdemeanor or something similar. But
prod Will for details or he'll call you a "stalker."
Trey. A fellow employee of Pizza Roma where Will works. Supposedly
threatened suicide in the parking lot with a shotgun he kept in the trunk
his car before Will and other employees talked him out of it.
Matt. Another employee of Pizza Roma.
Ben. The owner of Pizza Roma, allegedly clueless to everything going on
inside the store.
Rusty. Russell "Bert" Waters, AKA Russell B. Waters, AKA Rusty, is another
pizza boy who inhabits rec.arts.poems and alt.pizza.delivery.drivers and
is on a slightly lower level than Will when it comes to doing and saying
unbelievable shit that makes you wonder if they aren't some really bad
version of the Matrix. Rusty is an overweight, homosexual, white
who lives with his parents and works in a bank. We wish we were making
Other names may or may not be added, depending on their necessity to this
This went on and on, the Dink version of a Russian Novel, all devoted to
only interest, the life and times of "Will Dockery"
Example of Will Dockery's singing - better singers post your vids here
Dink's Watson to your Holmes.